But what is dating violence? It’s the abuse of one partner in a dating relationship by the other partner. Dating violence can take many forms such as harmful words or action. Basically, any act designed to hurt or control another is abusive behavior.  There are lots of myths.

What does dating violence look like?

Emotional Abuse
Affects a person’s self-esteem or causes shame.
Repeated lies and problem promises

• Withholding affection – giving the silent treatment
• Extreme jealousy that keeps a partner away from friends or interests
• Insults and put-downs
• Threats against a person’s safety
• Controlling a person’s every move – how to dress, what to eat, where to go

Physical Abuse
Causes physical pain or injury.

• Punching, kicking or slapping
• Shaking, pushing or grabbing hard enough to cause discomfort
• Attacking with a knife, gun or other weapon
• Any physical act that is unwanted or hurtful – even tickling or hugging, if it’s unwanted

Sexual Abuse
It is any kind of unwanted sexual advance or contact.

• Unwelcome sexual comments
• Kissing
• Intercourse

Forced sexual intercourse between two people who know each other is called “date rape”

Abusers may regret their actions and in some cases try to make up for what they did with gifts or nice treatment. They only will abuse again later. It is a cycle of abuse and apology develops.

Effects range from broken bones and bruised self-esteem to permanent injury and even death. Victims may begin to think abuse is part of relationship preventing a young person from developing healthy relationships.

In Involved in An Unhealthy Relationship?

Believe in Yourself

• Stand by your feelings
• It isn’t your fault.

Get help

• Talk with someone … call a friend, caring adult, crisis hotline, or a member of the clergy
• Consider getting counseling
• If you feel threatened seek a shelter and call police
• If you’ve been hurt, get medical attention

Get out

• Abusive relationships tend to get worse not better
• Resist the temptation to give the person one more chance

Know a Friend Who Needs Help?

Believe Your Friend

• Victims need to know they are not blamed for the abuse

Support Your Friend

• Listen and be there for your friend
• Encourage them to get help

Suggest Options

• Help your friend think of ways to overcome fears and concerns

Information for this article was gathered from Contact Delaware and the CDC.